Where do you begin?

Thought I'd share with you some more of the esteemed (ahem) 'wisdom' of that sage-like hero of budget aviation Michael O'Leary (pictured right doing something unspeakable to the nose-cone of a jet). Mikey gave a practically unhinged interview in the Times the other day, from which I culled the following frothy-mouthed quotes. Is Michael trying to be the Clarkson of the air we ask ourselves?

On the threat of recession to his company:

“It will never go horrendously wrong when you’re offering the cheapest fares in Europe. We just have to keep flying more aircraft, opening up more routes and offering people more cheap flights."

So it's definitely going to be business as usual then despite an 85% drop in profits...

On being successfully sued by President Sarkozy of France for using a photo of him and his wife in their marketing without permission:

“We paid €60,000 to their charity but we got more than €5 million worth of free publicity so we’re happy. I’m available to kiss and make up with Mrs Sarkozy any time she wants.”

And we're sure she's just melting at that prospect Mike...

On environmental hypocrites:

“Green protesters are our best passengers. They’re always flying off to their demonstrations."

(!)

On the stag and hen do parties that Ryannair has unleashed to fill the streets of Prague and other destinations with vomit and violence:

“I hate this censorious attitude to what people do. If you think they’re setting a bad example I would point you to lunatics like Robert Mugabe. He didn’t go on a stag night, he starved his entire people.”

Not sure who started the equation of Mugabe and rowdy, boozed up Brits abroad...but maybe we should all leave off little old Ryannair while we sort out the Middle East, Afghanistan, Chechnya and other simmering conflicts around the world...

On budget airlines as visionaries who are creating a more equal society:

“Low fares have transformed Europe politically. There’s much more movement of young people across the Continent. We’ve done more for European integration than any old fart politician in Brussels."

(see above on stag and hen dos)

On the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change and green campaigners:

“The green lobby are like those old guys in the medieval market-place, shouting about the end of the world. Climate change is not the biggest threat to mankind. If it is, why is the summer so crappy?”

“This global warming nonsense is no different to some of the more lunatic movements you’ve had throughout history. They were excommunicating Galileo 500 years ago for suggesting the Earth might go round the Sun. Now the nutbag ecologists say we’re boiling the planet to extinction. This is just the crazy idea for the first decade of the 21st century.”

Mikey demonstrates his full grasp of the climate change challenge, pauses for breath and then rants on...

"Environmental campaigners would be queueing for the dole if they were not 'prattling on about climate change.'"

"The economic downturn will end the eco-fad. “All this climate change stuff is an inevitable byproduct of a ten-year period of economic growth and low unemployment. Now we have a recession you’ll hear an awful lot less about the bloody environment.”

Don't bet on it dickhead...

On other modes of sustainable transport:

“Bugger bicycles"

And finally, somewhat undermining the reason that most people use his planes:

“I don’t like to go abroad on holiday. I’m an Irish peasant farmer – I don’t like sunshine. When I can stay at home in Ireland what the hell would I want to go away for?”

But of course we save the best till last and his immortal claim:

“[I'd rather} be in a lunatic asylum than be a politician"

Mikey, you know what, it can be arranged!